1 - A drunk man
who smelled like a beer sat
down on a subway seat next to a priest.
The man's ti... More ›› 2 - A couple had two little mischievous boys,
ages 8 and 10. They
were always getting into trouble,... More ›› 3 - This fundamentalist Christian couple felt it
important to
own an equally
fundamentally Christia... More ›› 4 - A very religious man lived right next
door to an atheist. While
the religious one prayed day i... More ›› 5 - Little
Mary was not the best
student in Sunday School. Usually she slept
through the class. On... More ›› 6 - The two thousand member
Baptist church
was filled to overflowing capacity one Sunday morning. Th... More ›› 7 - A man sobering up from the night before is
sitting through the
Sunday sermon, finding it long an... More ›› 8 - A preacher was completing
a temperance
sermon: with great
expression he said, "If I had all th... More ›› 9 - A Christian man had
just died and was on
his way to heaven. When he got to the gates of
heaven... More ›› 10 - On
the airplane on his way back to Rome,
the Pope was doing a crossword
puzzle. After a while,... More ›› 11 - God created the donkey &
said to him : "
You will work unceasingly from sunrise to sunset
carr... More ›› 12 - A
priest was called away for an
emergency. Not wanting to leave the
confessional unattended, h... More ›› 13 - There's this guy who had been lost and
walking in the desert for about 2 weeks. One hot day, he... More ›› 14 - Three
Reform Rabbis were in a terrible
auto wreck. None
survived.
One minute they were dri... More ›› 15 - The Chief Rabbi and the Pope are in a
meeting in Rome. The Rabbi notices a fancy shmancy phone o... More ›› 16 - A Catholic Priest and
a Rabbi were
chatting one day when the conversation turned to a
discussi... More ›› 17 - A
preacher, who shall we say was "humor
impaired," attended a conference
to help encourage and... More ›› 18 - The Reverend
Francis Norton woke up
Sunday morning and realizing it was an
exceptionally beaut... More ›› 19 - A Jewish guy called Jacob finds himself in
dire
trouble. His business has gone bust and he's in... More ›› 20 - It seems that there was a little old church
out in the countryside: painted white and with a hig... More ›› 21 - A lawyer and the pope were both killed in an
accident.
The two were in line to see St. Peter at... More ›› 22 - While leading the Friday evening
services, the Rabbi noticed a member of
the congregation, Bern... More ›› 23 - Two nuns, Sister Mary Agnes and Sister Mary
Vincent,
are
traveling through Europe in their car... More ›› 24 - This fundamentalist Christian couple felt it
important to own an
equally fundamentally Christian... More ›› 25 - Seymour was a good and pious man, and when
he passed away,
the Lord
himself greeted him at the... More ›› 26 - Moses,
Jesus and an old man are golfing.
Moses steps up to
the tee and hits the ball. It goes s... More ›› 27 - Old Mrs.
Watkins awoke one spring morning
to find that the river had flooded the
entire first... More ›› 28 - An old preacher was dying. He sent a message
for his banker and his lawyer, both church members,... More ›› 29 - A Jewish lady named Mrs. Rosenberg who many
years ago was
stranded late one night at a fashiona... More ›› 30 - I was walking across a bridge one day, and I
saw a man standing on
the edge, about to jump off.... More ›› 31 - As Bill was approaching mid-life, physically
he
was a mess. Not only was he going bald, but year... More ›› 32 - A priest and a nun are on their way
back
home from a trip when their car breaks down. They are u... More ›› 33 - There's
this old priest who got sick of
all the people in his parish
who kept confessing to adu... More ›› 34 - A man is
struck by a bus on a busy
street in in New York City.
He lies dying on the sidewalk as... More ›› 35 - A Rabbi and a Priest were sitting together
on a
train, and the Rabbi
leans over and asks, "So h... More ›› 36 - Mr. Smith was brought to Mercy
Hospital
(a Catholic hospital),
and taken quickly in for coronar... More ›› 37 - The Pope dies and, naturally, goes to
heaven. He's met by the
reception committee, and
after a... More ›› 38 - God is sitting up in his ivory
tower,
he's had enough of the pressures and stresses of being the... More ›› 39 - Sister Mary burst into the office of the
principal of Our Lady
of Perpetual Motion parochial sc... More ›› 40 - The Baptist preacher just finished his
sermon for the day and
proceeded toward the back of the c... More ›› 41 - There's this cathedral that's still being
worked on, and the workers have rigged a "cage elevato... More ›› 42 - Easter is approaching. Father O'Maley
checks estimates for the flower
decoration of the altar.... More ›› 43 - An elderly man was quite unhappy because he
had lost his
favorite hat.
Instead of buying a
new... More ›› 44 - One Sunday morning the pastor
noticed
little Johnny was
standing staring up at the large plaqu... More ›› 45 - Pat and Mike were walking down the
street, when they came to the church, Pat says, 'Mike, you wa... More ›› 46 - A farmer named Muldoon lived alone in the
Irish countryside except for a pet dog he for a long t... More ›› 47 - A little nine year old girl was in church
with her mother when she
started feeling ill.
"Mom... More ›› 48 - One afternoon a little boy was playing
outdoors. He used his
mother's broom as a horse and had a... More ›› 49 - A little nine year old girl
was in
church with her mother when she started
feeling ill. "Mommy... More ›› 50 - A Sunday school teacher of preschoolers
asked the students to learned one fact about Jesus by th... More ›› 51 - There is a story about a monastery in Europe
perched high on a cliff several hundred feet in the... More ›› 52 - A priest and a
rabbi operated a church
and a synagogue
across the street from each other. Since... More ›› 53 - A little Catholic
kid was praying as
hard as he could.
'God,' he prayed, 'I really want a
car... More ›› 54 - When this guy heard that the Pope was coming
to town, he went
out and bought a tuxedo in the ho... More ›› 55 - A big, burly man visited the pastor's home
and asked to see the minister's wife, a woman well kn... More ›› 56 - Johnny was asked
by his mother what he
had learned in Sunday School.
"Well, mum, our teacher... More ›› 57 - A pious man who had reached the age of 105
suddenly
stopped going to synagogue. Alarmed by the... More ›› 58 - God looks down and notices that Adam is all
alone
while all the animals have companions, so he d... More ›› 59 - Two priests and a rabbi were discussing what
portion of the
weekly collection they kept for the... More ›› 60 - Several years ago, the
Catholic Church
required women to wear a head
covering in order to enter... More ›› 61 - A Jesuit,
a Dominican and a Franciscan
were walking along an old road,
debating the greatness... More ›› 62 - A Nun and her friend, Sarah were playing
golf. Sarah misses a 3
foot putt and yells, "Goddamn it... More ›› 63 - A preacher was completing a temperance
sermon: with great expression he said, "If I had all the... More ›› 64 - A man
walked into a gift shop that sold
religious items. Near
the cash register he saw a displa... More ›› 65 - A few years ago, when
the Catholic
church reform began to be much
in the news, Mrs. Moskowitz s... More ›› 66 - A little girl spoke to her teacher about
whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible... More ›› 67 - This minister just had all of his
remaining teeth pulled and new dentures were being made.
Th... More ›› 68 - It was about a month
ago when a man in
Amsterdam felt that he needed to confess, so went to
hi... More ›› 69 - When the airline
Captain announced they
were flying over Salt Lake
City, Utah, a woman
told th... More ›› 70 - Three Pastors from the south were having
lunch in a diner. One said, "Ya
know, since summer st... More ›› 71 - The little church in the suburbs suddenly
stopped buying from its
regular office supply dealer.... More ›› 72 - On the steps of this church two pan handlers
were doing
their daily
business. One wore a large... More ›› 73 - Three Pastors from the south were having
lunch in a diner. One said, "Ya know, since summer star... More ›› 74 - Jesus and Moses
are sitting in a boat
fishing and Jesus says to Moses "I
want to do a miracle... More ›› 75 - Knowing that the minister was very fond of
cherry brandy, one of the
church elders offered to pr... More ›› 76 - Two nuns were driving alone out in the
boonies. They ran out of gas.
Fortunately they could wa... More ›› 77 - Jesus saw a crowd chasing down a woman
to stone her and approached them. "What's going on here,... More ›› 78 - O'Toole
worked in the lumber yard for
twenty years and all that time he'd been
stealing the wo... More ›› 79 - The Pope took a philosophy professor (an
atheist at that) out fishing on
a large lake. As they... More ›› 80 - Sometimes
women are overly suspicious of
their husbands. When Adam stayed out
very late for a... More ›› 81 - Delivering a speech at a banquet on the
night of his arrival in a large city, a visiting ministe... More ›› 82 - Before performing a baptism, the priest
approached the
young father and
said solemnly, "Baptis... More ›› 83 - A friend was in front of me coming out of
church one day, and the preacher was standing at the d... More ›› 84 - The Reverend
Billy Graham tells of a
time early in his ministry when he arrived in a
small tow... More ›› 85 - A local priest and pastor stood by the side
of
the road holding up a sign that said, "The End is... More ›› 86 - A
minister told his congregation, "Next
week I plan to preach about the
sin of lying. To help... More ›› 87 - The priest was preparing a man for his long
day's journey into night.
Whispering firmly, the pr... More ›› 88 - A Brit, a
Frenchman and a
Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve
frolicking in the
G... More ›› 89 - A kindergarten teacher was observing her
classroom of children while
they were drawing. She wal... More ›› 90 - Johnny is walking along and a priest is
coming the other way. Johnny says,
"Hey, mister, why a... More ›› 91 - A
young lad was visiting a church for
the first time, checking all the
announcements and poste... More ›› 92 - The congregation was sitting and waiting for
the preacher
to began his sermon when two masked m... More ›› 93 - Morris was passing a small courtyard and
heard voices
murmuring.
He went in and saw an altar wi... More ›› 94 - An old rabbi
is talking with one of his
friends and
says with a warm smile, "I gladdened seven... More ›› 95 - The preacher was wired for sound with a
lapel
mike, and as he preached, he moved briskly about t... More ›› 96 - After church on
Sunday morning, a young
boy suddenly
announced to his mother, "Mom, I've decid... More ›› 97 - One day God called the Pope, and he
said
"John Paul I have good news and
bad news. First the g... More ›› 98 - A Baptist missionary was walking in Africa
when he
heard the ominous padding of a lion behind hi... More ›› 99 - A mother was teaching her three
year old
daughter The Lord's
Prayer. For several evenings at b... More ›› 100 - There was an old
woman on a plane,
sitting next to
the Pope. It was stormy outside, and the pl... More ›› 101 - A little boy
was learning about God in
his church, and he was talking to
his mother about it.... More ›› 102 - A priest was vested in his surplus and
cassock ready to process at the
beginning of the servic... More ›› 103 - The church was conducting its annual fund
drive. One member of the
congregation said, "I give te... More ›› 104 - And Jesus said unto his disciples,
"Whom
do men say
that I am?"
And His disciples answered... More ›› 105 - Examiner: I think you know very little, if
anything at all, about the Bible. Can you quote any p... More ›› 106 - Two bishops were
discussing the decline
in morals in the modern world.
"I didn't sleep with m... More ›› 107 - At the first session of a conversion class
the
minister conducting the class asked, "What must
w... More ›› 108 - "And how much of that stack of hay did you
steal, Kavanaugh?" the priest asked at confession.... More ›› 109 - Q. How do we know that Job went to a
chiropractor?
A. Because in Job 16:12 we read, "I had come... More ›› 110 - The
local priest came across Paddy who had stumbled
out of
the town tavern.
"Paddy," he sai... More ›› 111 - Q. Where is the first baseball game in the
Bible?
A. In the big inning, Eve stole first, Adam s... More ›› 112 - Mortal: What is a million years like to you?
God: Like one second.
Mortal: What is a milli... More ›› 113 - Q. What kind
of motor vehicles are in
the Bible?
A. 2 Cor. 48 describes going out in service in... More ›› 114 - An old drunk stumbles into a confessional.
After
not hearing anything
for a while the
Priest k... More ›› 115 - A minister was asked by a
politician,
"Name something the government can do to help the church."... More ›› 116 - Q. Who was the greatest female financier in
the Bible?
A. Pharaoh's daughter. She went down to th... More ›› 117 - Q. Which servant of Jehovah was the
most
flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?
A. Moses. Because he... More ›› 118 - Q. What excuse did Adam give to his
children as to why he no longer lived in Eden?
A. Your moth... More ›› 119 - Q. Who was the greatest financieer in the
Bible?
A. Noah. He was floating his stock while everyon... More ›› 120 - Q. How
can you tell if someone is half
Catholic and half Jewish?
A. When he goes to confession,... More ›› 121 - Q: Why do they say 'Amen' at
the end
of a prayer instead of 'Awomen'?
A: The same reason they... More ›› 122 - Did you hear about that guy
who was
asked to be a Jehovah's witness?
- He refused becuase he... More ›› 123 - Q. Why was Goliath so surprised when David
hit him with a slingshot?
A. The thought had never e... More ›› 124 - Q. Which
area of Palestine was
especially wealthy?
A. The area around the Jordan. The banks wer... More ›› 125 - Q. What is one of the first things that
Adam and Eve did after they were kicked out?
A. They r... More ›› 126 - Q: What's the difference between Jesus and
a picture of Jesus?
A: It only takes one nail to han... More ›› 127 - Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the
Bible?
A. Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garde... More ›› 128 - Q. What kind of
motor vehicles are in
the Bible?
A. Honda...because the apostles were all in on... More ›› 129 - Q. Where is the first tennis match mentioned
in
the Bible?
A. When Joseph served in Pharaoh's c... More ›› 130 - What do you get when you cross a Jehova's
witness with a
business man?
A door to door sales... More ›› 131 - Q. What
kind of motor vehicles are in
the Bible?
A. David's Triumph was heard throughout the la... More ›› 132 - Q: Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40
years?
A: Even then men wouldn't ask for directio... More ›› 133 - Q. How did Adam and Eve feel when expelled
from the
Garden of Eden?
A. They were really put out... More ›› 134 - Q. Who is the greatest
babysitter
mentioned in the Bible?
A. David. He rocked Goliath to sleep.... More ›› 135 - Q: When was the longest day in the Bible?
A: The day Adam was created because there was no Eve.... More ›› 136 - Paul says to Jesus, "Hey man, whatcha doing
for Passover?"
Jesus says, "Just hanging around."... More ›› 137 - What's the moral of the story
about
Jonah and the whale ?
You can't keep a good man down !... More ›› 138 - Doctor: 'Your recovery was a miracle!'
Patient: 'PRAISE GOD. Now I don't have to pay you!'... More ›› 139 - Who is the fastest runner in
history.
Adam - because he was the first in the human race.... More ›› 140 - What's black and
white, black and
white, black and white?
A nun rolling down a hill.... More ›› 141 - Q. Who
was the greatest comedian in the
Bible?
A. Samson. He brought the house down.... More ›› 142 - What do you get
when you cross Holy
Water with castor oil?
A religious movement!... More ›› 143 - Jill: Have you read the Bible?
Jack: No,
I'm waiting for the film to come round.... More ›› 144 - Q: Did you hear about the dyslexic
Satanist?
A: He sold his soul to Santa.... More ›› 145 - What is the meaning of life?
All
evidence to date suggests it's chocolate.... More ›› 146 - Who was the best actor in the bible
?
Samson, he brought the house down !... More ›› 147 - Q. What is the best way to get to
Paradise?
A. Turn right and go straight.... More ›› 148 - Q: Why did God
create man before woman?
A: He didn't want any advice.... More ›› 149 - How do Religious Education
teachers mark
exams?
With spirit levels.... More ›› 150 - Q. What kind of man was Boaz before he got
married?
A. Ruth-less.... More ›› 151 - Q: What do you call a sleepwalking
nun?
A: A roamin' Catholic!... More ›› 152 - Q. What do they
call pastors in
Germany?
A. German Shepherds.... More ›› 153 - What did Adam do when he wanted some
sugar?
He raised Cain.... More ›› 154 - Q. How do you make holy water?
A. Boil
the hell out of it.... More ›› 155 - Q: Why didn't Noah go fishing?
A: He
only had two worms!... More ›› 156 - What language do the
Vatican Police
speak?
Pig Latin!... More ›› 157 - Is there a
God?
A billion Hindus
can't be wrong.... More ›› 158 - At what time of day was Adam born?
Just
before Eve.... More ›› 159 - Who designed Noah's ark?
An ark-itect
!... More ›› |
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