1 - David received a parrot for his birthday. This
parrot was fully grown with a bad attitude and te... More ›› 2 - Why does a flamingo lift up one leg ?
Because
if he lifted up both legs it would fall over !... More ›› 3 - What did one chicken say to the other after they
walked through poison ivy ?
"You scratch my be... More ›› 4 - What did the baby
chick say when he saw his
mother sitting on an orange ?
'Dad, dad, look what... More ›› 5 - Q: Why did the chicken say,
"Meow, oink,
bow-wow, and moo?"
A: He was studying foreign languag... More ›› 6 - Why did the chicken cross
the road in
Missouri?
To show the opossum it could be done.... More ›› 7 - What's another name for a clever duck ?
A
wise quacker !... More ›› 8 - What kind of doctor does a duck
visit?
A
Ducktor.... More ›› 9 - A man with a talking parrot is getting married. On
the day of the wedding he says to the parrot... More ›› 10 - Late one night, a burglar
broke into a house
he thought was empty.
He tiptoed through the li... More ›› 11 - A couple of pigeons made a
date to meet on
the ledge outside the tenth floor of a skyscraper. Th... More ›› 12 - How many ducks would there be,
if you saw two
ducks in front of two ducks, two ducks between two... More ›› 13 - "Look at that speed!"
said one hawk to
another as the jet fighter plane hurtled over their
hea... More ›› 14 - What do you get if you cross
a giant, hairy
monster with a penguin?
I don't know but it's a ve... More ›› 15 - What do you get if you cross a woodpecker
with a carrier pigeon ?
A bird who knocks before del... More ›› 16 - Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if
they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls (bagels,... More ›› 17 - What happened to the chicken whose feathers were
all
pointing the wrong way ?
She was tickled... More ›› 18 - What do you get if you cross a bee with a
parrot?
An animal that's always telling you how busy... More ›› 19 - Did you hear about the chicken that wanted to
take ballet lessons?
"He wanted to be a hentertaine... More ›› 20 - What's brown and white and flies all
over?
Thanksgiving turkey, when you carve it with a chain sa... More ›› 21 - What goes 'peck, bang, peck, bang, peck, bang'
?
A bunch of chickens in a field full of balloons... More ›› 22 - Why were the hens lying on their backs
with
their legs in the air ?
Because eggs were going up... More ›› 23 - Chicken to turkey: "Only Thanksgiving and
Christmas???
You're lucky, with us it's any Sunday."... More ›› 24 - What do you call a rooster who
wakes you up
at the same time every morning ?
An alarm cluck !... More ›› 25 - Why does a chicken coop have two doors
?
Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan!... More ›› 26 - What did the baby owl's parents say when he
wanted
to go to a party?
You're not owld enough.... More ›› 27 - What do you get if you cross a parrot with a
woodpecker ?
A bird that talks in morse code !... More ›› 28 - What do you get if you cross a parrot with a
shark ?
A bird that will talk you ear off !... More ›› 29 - What did the chicken do when he saw a bucket of
fried chicken ?
She kicked the bucket !... More ›› 30 - Two owls were playing pool.
One said, "Two
hits."
The other replied, "Two hits to who?"... More ›› 31 - Teacher: What's the definition of a
Polygamist?
Pupil: A parrot with more than one wife!... More ›› 32 - What is the difference between a fly and a bird
?
A bird can fly but a fly can't bird !... More ›› 33 - Teacher: Why do we put a hyphen in a bird-cage?
Pupil: For a parrot to perch on, miss.... More ›› 34 - What did the parrot say when he was using the
Internet?
P.Cs of eight, P.Cs of eight.... More ›› 35 - What do you get if you cross an eagle with a
skunk?
A bird that stinks to high heaven.... More ›› 36 - How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land
safely ?
With it's sparrowchute !... More ›› 37 - What do you call a parrot when it has dried
itself
after a bath?
Polly unsaturated!... More ›› 38 - Why didn't the chicken skeleton cross
the
road ?
Because he didn't have enough guts... More ›› 39 - Why did the chick
disappoint his mother ?
He wasn't what he was cracked up to be !... More ›› 40 - Why is politics for the birds?
Because
politiciands always parrot the same old lines!... More ›› 41 - Why did the parrot wear a raincoat ?
Because
she wanted to be a Polly unsaturated !... More ›› 42 - What do you get if you cross a parrot with a
centipede ?
A great walkie-talkie !... More ›› 43 - Why did the chicken cross the basketball court
?
He heard the referee calling fowls... More ›› 44 - What do you call a chicken that crosses the road
without looking both ways?
Dead.... More ›› 45 - What did the rich socialite's parrot
say?
Polly want a cracker, with cavier please!... More ›› 46 - Whose parrot sits on his shoulder shouting
"Pieces of
four"?
Short John Silver!... More ›› 47 - Q: Why did the rooster cross the road?
A: To
get to the chick across the street!... More ›› 48 - What profession did the parrot get into when it
swallowed the clock?
Politics... More ›› 49 - How do you identify a bald eagle?
All his
feathers are combed over to one side.... More ›› 50 - What did they call the canary that flew into the
pastry dish ?
Tweetie Pie !... More ›› 51 - What do you get when you cross a chicken
with
a duck?
A bird that lays down !... More ›› 52 - Why did the chicken cross the road half way
?
He wanted to lay it on the line !... More ›› 53 - What do you get if you cross a chicken
with a
cement mixer ?
A brick-layer !... More ›› 54 - Why did a man's
pet vulture not make a sound
for five years?
It was stuffed.... More ›› 55 - Why are there no
aspirin in the
jungle?
The parrots eat em all (Paracetamol)... More ›› 56 - What is the definition of a goose ?
An animal
that grows down as it grows up !... More ›› 57 - Why is a sofa like a roast chicken ?
Because
they're both full of stuffing !... More ›› 58 - My parrot lays square eggs but
can only say
one word.
What's that?
Ouch!... More ›› 59 - What are a parrot's favourite literary
characters?
Mr Macawber and Pollyanna!... More ›› 60 - What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top
of a
barn ?
An eggroll !... More ›› 61 - How can you tell if a parrot
is
intelligent?
It speaks in Polly-syllables!... More ›› 62 - What do you call a bunch of chickens playing
hide-and-seek ?
Fowl play !... More ›› 63 - What do you get if your budgie flies into the
blender ?
Shredded Tweet !... More ›› 64 - What do chicken families do on
Saturday
afternoon?
They go on peck-nics !... More ›› 65 - Why did the chicken cross the "net" ?
It
wanted to get to the other site !... More ›› 66 - What happens when geese land in a volcano ?
They cook their own gooses !... More ›› 67 - What flies through the jungle singing opera ?
The parrots of Penzance !... More ›› 68 - What do you get if you cross a duck with a
firework ?
A firequaker !... More ›› 69 - What did the parrot say on Independence
Day?
Polly wants a firecracker!... More ›› 70 - Why did the
bird join he air force?
He
wanted to be a parrot trooper!... More ›› 71 - Q: Why did the turkey cross
the road?
A: To
prove he wasn't chicken.... More ›› 72 - Why did the chicken cross the
playground
?
To get to the other slide... More ›› 73 - Why did the chicken end up in the soup
?
Because it ran out of cluck !... More ›› 74 - What do you get if you
cross a nun and a
chicken?
A pecking order.... More ›› 75 - How do you get a parrot to talk properly ?
Send him to polytechnic !... More ›› 76 - Why do parrots carry umbrellas?
So they don't
become polly-saturated!... More ›› 77 - How do you stop a rooser crowing
on Sunday ?
Eat him on Saturday !... More ›› 78 - What happened when the owl lost his voice ?
He didn't give a hoot !... More ›› 79 - Is chicken soup good for
your health ?
Not
if you're the chicken !... More ›› 80 - What's the definition of a Parapet?
Pet
parrot kept by parachutist!... More ›› 81 - What did the parrot say
when he saw a
duck?
Polly want a quacker!... More ›› 82 - What's a parrot's favourite song?
I love
Parrots in the Springtime!... More ›› 83 - When is the best time to buy budgies ?
When
they're going cheap !... More ›› 84 - What's got six legs and can fly long distances ?
Three swallows !... More ›› 85 - What do you call a bird that
lives
underground ?
A mynah bird !... More ›› 86 - What happens when a hen eats gunpowder ?
She
lays hand gren-eggs !... More ›› 87 - What birds spend all their time on their knees ?
Birds of prey !... More ›› 88 - What happened when the chicken ate cement
?
She laid a sidewalk !... More ›› 89 - What do you call the outside of a hand gren-egg
?
The bombshell !... More ›› 90 - What do you call the place where parrots make
films?
Pollywood!... More ›› 91 - What kind of birds do you usually find locked up
?
Jail-birds !... More ›› 92 - Why did the turkey cross the road
?
To
prove he wasn't chicken... More ›› 93 - Why did the owl, owl ?
Because the woodpecker
would peck 'er !... More ›› 94 - Where do the cleverest parrots live?
In the
brain tree forests!... More ›› 95 - Where do blind parrots go for treatment?
The
Birds Eye counter!... More ›› 96 - Q: Why do hens lay eggs?
A: If they dropped
them, they'd break... More ›› 97 - Q: What is a crowbar?
A: A place were crows go
to get a drink!... More ›› 98 - What's the definition of Parity?
Two parrots
exactly the same!... More ›› 99 - What happens when you drop a hand gren-egg
?
It eggs-plodes !... More ›› 100 - What geometric figure is like a runaway
parrot?
A polygon .... More ›› 101 - What do you call a woodpecker with no beak ?
A headbanger !... More ›› 102 - What happens when ducks fly upside
down ?
They quack up !... More ›› 103 - Why is it easy for chicks to talk ?
Because
talk is cheep !... More ›› 104 - Why do ducks have webbed feet ?
To stamp out
forest fires !... More ›› 105 - What is a duck's favorite TV show ?
The
feather forecast !... More ›› 106 - What do chickens serve at birthday
parties
?
Coop-cakes !... More ›› 107 - What do you call a crate of
ducks ?
A box
of quackers !... More ›› 108 - What do owls sing when it is raining ?
'Too
wet to woo' !... More ›› 109 - Where do birds invest their money ?
In the
stork market !... More ›› 110 - Teacher: What's a robin?
Fred: A bird that
steals, ma'am.... More ›› 111 - What do you call a vulture with no
beak?
A head banger.... More ›› 112 - What is green and pecks on trees ?
Woody Wood
Pickle !... More ›› 113 - What's the definition of Polystyrene?
A
plastic parrot!... More ›› 114 - What kind of bird lays electric eggs ?
A
battery hen !... More ›› 115 - How do you get a cut-price parrot ?
Plant
bird seed !... More ›› 116 - What do you call a very rude
bird ?
A
mockingbird !... More ›› 117 - What is the definition of Robin ?
A bird who
steals !... More ›› 118 - What do you get from a drunk chicken ?
Scotch
eggs !... More ›› 119 - What is a parrot's favorite game ?
Hide and
Speak !... More ›› 120 - What is a parrot's favorite
game?
Hide
and Speak!... More ›› 121 - What do you call a crazy chicken ?
A cuckoo
cluck !... More ›› 122 - Why does a rooster watch TV ?
For
hentertainment !... More ›› 123 - Where do birds meet for coffee ?
In a
nest-cafe !... More ›› 124 - How long do
chickens work ?
Around the
cluck !... More ›› 125 - Why don't chickens like people ?
They beat
eggs !... More ›› 126 - What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A
carrot!... More ›› 127 - Which bird is always out of breath ?
A puffin
!... More ›› 128 - What language do birds speak ?
Pigeon English
!... More ›› 129 - What birds are found in Portugal ?
Portu-geese
!... More ›› 130 - What do you call a Scottish parrot ?
A Macaw
!... More ›› 131 - Why did the rooster run away ?
He was chicken
!... More ›› 132 - What bird tastes just like butter ?
A stork
!... More ›› 133 - Which bird ran for President?
H. Ross
Parrot... More ›› 134 - How do you make a tame duck wild?
Annoy
it.... More ›› 135 - What do confused owls say?
Too-whit-to-why?... More ›› 136 - What do Scottish owls sing?
Owld Lang
Syne.... More ›› 137 - What's a parrot's favourite
game?
Monopoly!... More ›› 138 - What do you give a sick bird ?
Tweetment !... More ›› 139 - What did the scornful owl say?
Twit twoo.... More ›› 140 - What kind of bird opens doors ?
A kiwi !... More ›› 141 - What is the
strongest bird ?
A crane !... More ›› 142 - What does an educated owl say?
Whom.... More ›› 143 - What is a parrot?
A wordy birdy!... More ›› |
VOTE!
EMBED
