1 - A movie producer is lying by the pool at
the Beverly Hilton. His partner arrives in a great stat... More ›› 2 - After a difficult day a struggling actor
returns to his neighborhood and is shocked to find a ca... More ›› 3 - An actor went to see a new agent one day
and said, `You must have a look at my act, it really is... More ›› 4 - Q: How many UPM's does it take
to
screw in a light bulb?
A: None! If you'd just make it a day e... More ›› 5 - One
agent stops by another agent's
table to tell him the big news: "Elvis
just died!"
The... More ›› 6 - Q: How many Director's does it take to
screw in a light bulb?
A: Just one... but how do you ge... More ›› 7 - After a venerable career of endless,
stellar successes the greatest director who ever lived is i... More ›› 8 - The producer of a low budget film is
trying to convince the newly hired director of the quality... More ›› 9 - After a difficult day a struggling actor
returns to his neighborhood and is shocked to find a ca... More ›› 10 - A bit-part actor finally got his first
leading role
in a major film. In one scene the actor had... More ›› 11 - Fred: I met a really
conceited actor
the other day.
Harry: Why do you say he's conceited?
Fred... More ›› 12 - Q:
How many movie directors does it
take to change a lightbulb?
A: Just one, but he wants to d... More ›› 13 - Denied membership in an exclusive country
club because he was an
actor, biblical epic star Victo... More ›› 14 - How many film directors
does it take
to change a light bulb?
Just one, but he wants to do it th... More ›› 15 - Q: How many Development Executives does
it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Well, first let's... More ›› 16 - Q: How many Executive Producers does it
take to screw in a
light bulb?
A: Executive Producers d... More ›› 17 - Q: How many Camera Assistants does it
take to screw in a
light bulb?
A: Five: One to do it and... More ›› 18 - Q: How many Development Executives does
it take to
screw in a light bulb?
A: Two. One to take n... More ›› 19 - Q:
How many Stuntmen does it take to
screw in a light bulb?
A: Five. One to screw it in and fou... More ›› 20 - Q: How many
art directors does it
take to screw in a light bulb
A: Does it have to be a light... More ›› 21 - Q: What did the Production Manager give
his kids for
Christmas?
A: Nothing. But he promised he... More ›› 22 - Q: How many
Studio Executives does it
take to screw in a light bulb?
A: We don't know. Light bu... More ›› 23 - Q: How many PA's does
it take to
screw in a light bulb?
A: Nine........one to do it and eight o... More ›› 24 - Q: How many
actors does it take to
screw in a light bulb?
A: 100: One to do it and ninety-nine... More ›› 25 - Neighbour:
Haven't I seen you on TV?
Actor: Well, I do appear, on and off, you know. How do yo... More ›› 26 - Q: How many editors does it take to
change a light bulb?
A: If we change the light bulb, we'll... More ›› 27 - Q: How many 1st AD's does it take to
screw in a light bulb?
A: Why are you asking me that questio... More ›› 28 - Fred: I'd love to be an
actress.
Harry: Break a leg then! Amy: Whatever for?
Fred: Then you'... More ›› 29 - Q: How many DP's
does it take to
screw in a light bulb?
A: One. No, two. No... How many do we h... More ›› 30 - Producer: Would you call your leading
lady ugly?
Director: Let's just say she'd look better on... More ›› 31 - Q: How many Union
Lighting Technicians
does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: It's not a bul... More ›› 32 - Q: How many Wardrobe people does it take
to screw in a light
bulb?
A: "Nobody said I needed do... More ›› 33 - Q: How many Agents does it take to screw
in a light bulb?
A: Actually, agents will screw in just... More ›› 34 - Q: How many fire safety
guys dose it
take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One -- but it's an 8 hou... More ›› 35 - Q: How many DP's does it take to
screw in a light bulb?
A: Just one, if he's got a good crew to... More ›› 36 - Q: How can you tell the dumbest actress
working on a movie?
A: She's the one sleeping with the... More ›› 37 - Q: How many Screenwriters does it take to
screw in a light bulb?
A: The bulbs IN and it's stayin... More ›› 38 - Q: How many grips does it take to screw in
a light bulb?
A: Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it... More ›› 39 - Q: How many 2nd AD's does it take to
screw in a light bulb?
A: Uh...standby, I'll check on that... More ›› 40 - Q: How many Director's does it take to
screw in a light bulb?
A: Just one more, guys, I promise.... More ›› 41 - Q: How many
absurdist/surrealist
comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: November.... More ›› 42 - Why did Captain Kirk go into the ladies
toilet ? To boldly go where no man has been before !... More ›› 43 - What's the definition of a good actor?
Somebody who tries hard to be everybody but himself.... More ›› 44 - Q: How many screenwriters
to make
"Titanic" a good movie?
A: One more than they had.... More ›› 45 - Why was the
actor pleased to be on
the gallows?
Because at last he was in the noose.... More ›› 46 - Q: How many PA' does it take to screw in
a light bulb?
A: What's a light bulb?... More ›› 47 - Why do actors like snooker
halls?
Because that's where they get their best cues.... More ›› 48 - Why can't
anyone stay angry long
with an actress?
Because she always makes up.... More ›› 49 - Q: How many Sound Recordists
does it
take to screw in a light bulb?
A: WHAT?... More ›› 50 - Q: How many over eager PA's does it take
to
screw in a li...
A: Done!... More ›› 51 - What do you get if you cross a dog and a
film studio ?
Collie-wood !... More ›› 52 - What sort of animals make the best TV
presenters ?
Gnus - readers !... More ›› 53 - Why does an actor enjoy his work so
much?
Because it's all play.... More ›› 54 - What is an Actor? A man who tries to be
everything but
himself... More ›› 55 - What do you call a fight between film
actors ?
Star wars !... More ›› 56 - What kind of star wears sunglasses?
A
movie star.... More ›› |
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